Most importantly you have to pick up after your pups. Everyone you pass with a dog has that precious little plastic bag swinging elegantly from their hand as if proudly displaying the capture of the first turd of the day.
Since almost all the snowbirds are mated up, most you meet on the beach are coupled up and walk in lock step. It's amazing how like one another they have become. I've noticed they are both sociable or both can be the opposite.
In passing you can count on a minimum of, "Good Morning." I sometimes vary it up with, "Hi there." This is not the crowd for, "Hi bro." or "Whaz up?" If you recognize them from the park there is a longer version which can include, "Looks like another great day in paradise" or something equally innocuous and inane. Nobody does the "Buenos Dias" to anyone other than an obvious Mexican. Most Latinos are a bit shy but when you initiate the greeting it is returned with a genuine smile. They are very real people.
Since on the walk we are all so well spaced out on this huge expanse of sand and yet chock-a-block in the park it would be bad politics to act anything other than cordial. Word travels quickly and you don't want to risk being labeled a beach snob.
You would think not, but it is surprising how some manage to be absolutely rude. How you can pass someone from your own culture in a foreign land and not offer up more than a cursory nod is beyond me . . . but believe me it happens and when it does I remark to Nancy, hopefully within earshot of the offending couple, "They must be from Ontario." They are the worst.
Here I go with my generalizations again. Most here are Canadians, and we've developed a rating system. The folks from BC are the most friendly and open . . . a delight. Alberta is a close second with Ontarians disappointingly lagging far behind. Americans are by and large at least the equal of the British Columbians, with the gift of a warm greeting. Whether that is superficial is up for discussion but it does seem genuine.
Quebecers are very cliquish and not a lot of fun or outgoing. They don't seem to want to meet you and I'm afraid with that attitude it's infectious, 'cause as a result I don't have a lot of time for them. Maybe they're shy, but it does come across as snobby.
As with everything there are exceptions, but I feel I am on fairly safe grounds with my assessment of regional manners.
We've had some fun with individual beachers. There's the lady in the above picture that thinks she's in the gym. She spends her whole beach time going through a regimen of calisthenics and interval sprints that makes you tired watching her. I wouldn't be so critical if she did it in a discrete fashion but she is so in your face and so intense that we get the impression she thinks she's big and in reality she is. But that's not nice.
When passing other dog owners you allow yours to have a sniff but not linger. At least that's what feels right. There is maybe a, "Oh he has such an nice coat." or "She is so sweet." But you never assume an open invitation to let them play. Why I don't know. I suppose there is the unspoken worry they will get into a fight. It's a shame because most just want to have a good play. It's the owners that can be uptight.
Case in point. Last visit here there was this couple from England with a nasty little fat squeaky mutt. It's one thing to have a mean dog but for them to make you feel as if it is your fault for letting your well behaved, leashed dog come close enough to set this little bastard off is cause for retribution. The woman was so uptight and appeared as nasty as the tiny monster that I took perverse pleasure in pretending not to notice the angst this was causing. If I let him, our dog Amigo would treat this squeaky wind-up toy as an appetizer. Amigo just wagged his tail while the terror terrier and the woman went crazy. I know that wasn't nice either but there's not a lot to do this early in the morning but enjoy the opportunities life presents.
On the way back on the beach I got to thinking. Wouldn't the world be a better place if we were more like our dogs? A quick sniff, a wag of the tail and we'd be off playing. No pretext, hidden agenda or airs. Dogs take no time to sort out their differences and once they've established the pecking order it all seems to proceed smoothly. There are no games played in the mating process. Only when the female is in heat does sex enter the picture and then it's first come first served.
I'm not as convinced about my dog theory as I am about my beach etiquette. That beach one's solid. The dog thinking though will have to wait for tomorrow to be validated. The walk was over and it was back to the Airstream to prepare breakfast.
David Harris is the editor and publisher of the Huntsville Online.
